She is Thankful

August 7, 2013

This week in Second Life, our community lost someone very special, who goes by the name Millie. She was a lovely person who was so incredibly sweet and she’s touched a lot of peoples lives around Second Life. I knew her through plurk, from her funny plurks that were such an amusement to read, and I even met her at camp in world this summer at Camp Hardknock. She made jokes and talked with me one afternoon during an event and it struck me how amazingly amazing she was and how could I not have talked to her before in world? I’m so very sad to think she is gone, and I can only imagine how much pain her close friends and family must be feeling right now and my heart goes out to each and every single one of you during this sad time. In honor of Millie’s memory, Natalee Oodles are put together a very lovely and emotional blog piece and challenge for others to try. She asked ‘What are we thankful for? What do we want to improve?’ – Calling it her CHALLENGE YOURSELF blog challenge. (Click this thingy to go see her post!)

Firstly, I am so incredibly thankful for my friends and family, both in the real world and in the virtual world. I feel blessed that I not only have a huge, lovely and interesting family in the real world, but that I’m lucky enough to have a similar connection to people in the virtual world who I can call my Dad, my Mama, my Sister, and everyone else that I’ve managed to claim as my own family. And oh my gosh, my friends, those crazy people who stick by my shenanigans, good and bad in both worlds. I can’t even… I can’t even think what to write about right here, I just get so happy when I think about all of them, my family, my friends… All the laughs we’ve shared, the hugs we’ve exchanged, the tears, the smiles, the late nights playing weird zombie games, watching movies, the cuddles and even the select few friends I have in real life that feel the need to lick my face despite my complaining and frowny faces (ALSO KAITY WHO LIKES TO LICK MY FACE VIA CHAT ALL THE TIME.) there have been good times, oh my gosh have there been good times and there have been bad times, such bad times, when I’ve stumbled about blindly making the stupidest mistakes and choices, and yet there they are, my friends, my family, ready to help me up, pat me on the head and send me on my way in a better direction. I’ll say it again… I’m the luckiest girl because of the people in my life and I’ll always be thankful that they are mine to call my loved ones.

Things I need to improve. I have faults, I make stupid mistakes, oh gosh do I make stupid mistakes. I’ve done more then my fair share of stupid things in the past and I will admit to that and admit to hurting people that I deeply regret hurting. As always, the cause of all my past problems have always been communication. I have no idea how to speak my mind, none at all, nor do I know how to express my feelings. if I am hurting, I tend to keep it all inside, and I keep smiling. This isn’t always a good thing, as I’ve learned in the past when I just sort of broke. I have loved ones, I have people who are there to listen, yet I sit there in the corner feeling alone because I can’t seem to grasp the idea of communicating feelings to others. Heck, I can’t even communicate regularly. I go online, I go about in real life and I just never bug people, people I miss so badly, people I wanna message, and I just keep thinking “Well I am probably bugging them or….” and those thoughts will go on and on. I never IM people in Second Life, no matter how much I want to, people I wanna Skype, play games with, play games with, watch movies with. The worst part is that even when people talk to me first, text, IM’s, whatever, I’m still quiet and I have no idea why. It makes me sad, because I truly wanna be close to more people, I wanna get to know more of my plurk and SL friends, I wanna have movie nights and play crazy L4D games, I wanna go RP with people. I need to come out of this room I’ve built myself, knock it down, add windows, something.

I got pretty emotional writing this, as you can probably tell with my rambling. I ramble when I get excited, hyper, emotional, and sad. I do hope you all take the time to do this challenge though, I promise you won’t regret it. Anyway, before I show you my picture, I’d like to give a special thank you to the creator or MishMish for accepting me as a new blogger for her store! I am so excited to show you guys all her wonderful creations and today I start off by showing these adorable peacocks that she has made for the upcoming Collabor88, open this week!